The 54th Deadline: Life’s always going to give you another chance if you’re constantly persistent.
Over the years, there was one thing I really wanted amid my depression-riddled days as a discouraged individual: independence.
Of all things, independence was something I didn’t have to my name. Heck, just even the sense of dignity was hard to come by without independence.
My lack of independence derived from needing to live with my parents after college graduation. That time really put a damper on my confidence. I felt incapable of getting any sort of job to support myself, let alone earn money to put into my bank account.
I lacked motivation. I lacked energy. I ate wrong. I slept too much. Everything accumulated in a bad way over time, so I felt my ability of taking care of myself fade away for quite awhile.
Obviously, we all have to leave the nest at some point. Mom and dad aren’t going to be around forever, and there’s a point where someone like me needed to grow up and be a bonafide adult for once in his life. Alas, it took many years before I was able to achieve some semblance of independence.
Piece-by-piece, I had to rediscover new passions to steer me toward different directions in life.
Fast-forward to now, and I guess you could say I have a lot more independence than I know what to do with in so many ways. Sure, I lack a lot of random necessities such as a vehicle to drive around town in, but the basic framework of independence is there.
I wake up at responsible hours, go to work, buy my own groceries and so forth.
In lots of ways, I am grateful. I am happier because I can take care of myself in some fashion.
For instance, take today as an example.
Because it has been so dang hot at the start of this summer, I have been really needing some kind of reasonable way to stay cool.
Trust me. It gets really hot in the town I am living in, and just having some fans lying around wasn’t doing enough. I had three fans blowing at one point, and they all did zilch when the only thing happening was a constant circulation of hot air in a closed-off area.
So instead of suffering and literally sweating the summer heat, I made a big decision.
It was a big expense, but I had to buy an air conditioner. Because the space I live in lacks proper windows to use a regular air conditioner you attach on the outside, I had to get an inside variation that has the air vented outside like so.
Needless to say, it’s pretty COOL (don’t hate me) that my cat and I won’t have to melt inside my living space. Seriously, it was getting so hot that I was passing out from the heat. My cat could barely step foot into this room because it was getting too humid for her.
Hopefully, this air conditioner will do me wonders this summer. I look forward to staying cool when outside gets incredibly hot to unpleasant levels.
Anyway, every bit of independence has been helping my self-esteem and confidence. Yeah, this air conditioner was a big purchase, but it definitely made me feel like an independent adult making an important item to buy with money I have busted tail to earn.
I guess you could say I am scraping up traces of personal joy with stuff like this, as mundane as it may sound.
Every little bit helps.
“Get good. Be better.” – Nhan Fiction